Fans of Anarchy

SPOILER ALERT:  I'm two episodes in on Season 6.

What the frig is going on with Jax and Tara???  How do they go through 5 seasons with mutual respect and then BAM!  It's Season 6; let's totally become different people!  Divorce?  I'm sorry, what?  Come again?  There is no WAY Jax set Tara up.  He would never do that.  And WHY would she believe Gemma after all this time?  Because she changed a few stinky diapers??  Are you SERIOUS??  That makes about as much sense as Bobby wandering around California looking for Nomad contenders.

Don't get me started on Jax being a big, fat CHEATER and hooking up WHILE Tara's in jail.  Again - I know he did Ima the orange-faced, yellow-haired skank...but that was, in a sick and twisted way, FOR Tara.  This hook-up-with-Stifler's-hot-hooker-mom thing was just totally beneath him.

Tara needs to sit Jax down...say "Dude.  What the EFF is going on?"  and show his ass what she found in the toy box.  You know, the paperwork GEMMA hid there.  And hell - if it's someone else?  Excellent.  Bring it on.  I love some good intrigue.  But it ain't Jax.  Wake the fuck up.

Moving on...

Meh.  Not thrilled so far.  Good thing we're only two 2 eps in.  Too much serious shit going down and not enough laughs to sustain it.  I'm sorry, Kurt, you being a Jersey guy AND a Rutgers guy AND a pretty damned cool biker dude, yourself...but I gotta say it.  I'm super hopeful things will change as the season goes on.  I don't mean to Monday Morning Quarterback...but there's a little too much heat in the kitchen.  WTF happened to Tig's hilarity?  WTF happened to funny probies?  WTF happened to Gemma whacking chicks in the face with skateboards (or whatever the hell she whacked that ho in the face with.  That shit was FUNNY.)  We are well on our way to another Season 3 Ireland feel and I'm not likin' it too much.  You have Juice drug and kill the junkie mother of the kid who just shot up his school, Newtown style?  Ew guys...ew.

That said...

I'm glad Dave Navarro is dead.  There.  I said it.  I don't like that guy being on the show.  He's fine on his tattoo show and all...but he's overkill on SOA.  Just a little too obvious.  And, frankly, the Latino stuff is getting on my nerves a little bit.  Remember when Kevin Alejandro got his ass killed by his own dad?  THEY were scary.  THEY were interesting.  THEY commanded you sit your ass up in your chair and pay a-friggin-tention.  This crew is like the kinder, gentler Latino gang who just wants to scare you a little while they ride by on their BMX bikes.

OK back to Tara.  WHY does she want to give Wendy those kids?  I get that Tara knows Wendy gets the whole "get out of the MC life" thing...but I can't say I trust her enough not to screw up. Wendy is just going to turn around and hand those babies back to Jax, because she loves him.  Or Gemma, because she'll make her life hell until she does.  That's what Gemma does.

Speaking of Gemma, does Katey Sagal kick some major ass?  She's just. So. Good.  How about when she came out of the bathroom and annoying, asshole, ponytail man was sitting there.  She had just been crying her eyes out but immediately straightened herself out an said "Fuck you" - even though he just mentioned his sister was the one Otto killed.  No apologies.  No surrender.  Gemma is the one constant on this show.  I wait every week to see what sick and twisted thing she's going to make look perfectly normal next...and she never disappoints.


Everyone just cross your fingers that some comic relief is coming our way.  Bring back Filthy Phil,
the laid-back-to-the-point-of-not-breathing prospect who will do just about anything.  Have Tig go into a strip club, only to find out the strippers are pre-op trannies...and have a great time.  Make Gemma go to the store with Tara and get into a fight with the produce wench.  Just do SOMETHING comical that will off-set the intensity of this season!  Please!

Season 6 Teaser Trailer

AWESOME Canadian Bikers

I love these guys so much, I don't know what to do with myself!  Quick!  Someone call Kurt Sutter!  He's got some serious material here!  Instead of Tap and Mercy, he can have Chibs and Tig in the courtroom!

Thanks to JJ for the find.  Keep 'em coming!

Goodbye Season 5

SPOILER ALERT:  I HAVE FINISHED SEASON 5, Y'ALL!!!

Jax, hair is everything in
this life.  Remember that. 

You have to love Pope's wisdom:

"Revenge is not about the greater good.  It's a visceral need that has to be satisfied or the strong lose focus."

This is seriously one of the most profound things ever said...I think in life!

And I don't know why I loved Pope so much.  I somewhat compared him to the chicken dude in Breaking Bad.  The worst of the worst...but someone you can really learn from.  Dude was Jax's mentor!  Outstanding!


Tara: "He knew everything"
Me: "Did he know you cut your own bangs?"

Chuckie's Cat in the Hat rhyming is hilarious.

Duhhhhhhhhhh...

Shrek:  I laugh every time they show this guy!  He adds next to nothing to the show...yet I'd hate it if they got rid of him!  I really have no clue why he made it in so fast, either.  Look at Prospect!  It took him forever and he died tryin'!  This guy, Shrek, is such a dolt.  But he's loyal to a fault and will truly do anything they ask...with a smile on his face...while saying "Thank you, Sir.  May I have another?"

Jimmy Smits is the MAN!!!! He's ridiculously convincing as a gang lord.  Seriously!  I am really impressed.  What a brilliant career move!

AMAZING artwork
from SSAVA on
Deviantart 

Holy holy shit.  Holy SHIT!!!!  Gemma, you ignorant SLUT!  I can't BELIEVE she set Tara up!!!    OH my god...did she tell the po po that Tara conspired with Otto?? Or just that she asked for the cross?  And oh my god it's on video.  Holy shit.

Ya know...WHAT is Gemma's damage?? WHY does she insist on staying involved with the MC?  Clay's history.  John Teller's been gone a long time.  It's like...she loves the violence and the drama!  Wouldn't you think she'd like her son to get out and move to Portland with his sons?  She could move up there too and find herself a 50-something hottie.  (My husband will once again tell me I'm injecting my own brand of morality into the show right now. LOL)

Jax...I think I just sharted.

Moving on.  Holy crap.  Jax turning on Pope and saving Tig?  Seriously one of the greatest television moments of all time.  I went from hating Jax - to loving him - in 2 seconds flat.  He went from being the Devil - to being an Angel- in one fell swoop.  And it's so ridiculously hard to wrap your brain around.  When I thought he was going to hand over one man to be killed - I hated him.  But when I knew HE killed 4 guys to save that man - I thought he was the most amazing guy  on the planet.  I sat there with the tears streaming down my face...first in sadness and then to rejoice.  Truly amazing.  This scene is right up there with the scene with Richard Harrow in the woods in season 2 of Boardwalk Empire.  (I strongly advise you NOT to watch that link you've a) seen it already on Boardwalk Empire or b) plan to watch Boardwalk Empire an truly do not give a shit about massive spoilers.

Wahhh. Wahhh. Wahhh. 

What's with Bobby ripping his patch off?  What a little puss puss.  I love him - but good riddance if he's going to leave over this.  I thought he was right when he was the only "ney" on the Clay mahem vote.  But when he came down on Jax after everything went down with Clay going to jail?  No way, man...you're wrong.  And biker or not, I hope you're headed home, patchless, to that shower of yours...because you're looking scraggly.

THANK GOD TIG IS STILL WITH US!!!  He's WAY too strong of a personality to disappear.  I love him almost as much as I love Chibs.

Poor Tara.  Girlfriend has a decent right hook...but no way in hell is she going to be able to hold her own in prison.

"Dear Otto, 

You are a freak and I had to pause Sons of Anarchy when you bit your own tongue off because I thought I might throw up.  For realz.  

Love, 
Carol."

WOW - so now I have to wait for season 6!  No more SAMCRO marathons!  I don't know how to feel about that!  I know one thing - my dreams will be a lot less scary!

Here are some Season 6 spoilers, y'all.  Don't say I didn't warn ya!

Sons of Anarchy Drinking Game

SAMCRO Drinking Game:

Drink whenever Jax says "I'm not gonna let that happen."
Drink whenever Jax says "How are we going to make this right?"
Drink whenever Tara does something stupid as hell.
Drink whenever Chuckie says "I can accept that."
Drink whenever Clay takes his sunglasses on/off.
Drink whenever Tig says something sick, wrong and hilarious.
Drink whenever Chibs says "JACKIE BOYYYYYY!"
Drink whenever Opie's wearing a man bun.
Drink whenever anyone's wearing a man bun.


By all means, feel free to add your own in the comments!

More Things, Life, Whatnot (Season 5)

SPOILER ALERT:  Episode 10 - Season 5

Tig to the head of the Grim Bastards:  "Let's just find Fat Albert and cave his skull in."  I swear I almost soiled myself at this.  Writing = Brills

Gotta love how Clay's talking to Juice and giving him this pretend-heartfelt speech...and it's all bullshit.  "I've done some horrible things in my life...blah blah blah...waaah waaah...watch my back." OMG Clay is out of control.  He's SO annoying now.  How the mighty have fallen!!  Just shut UP already, douche!

Things, Life, Whatnot (Season 5)

A few things:

I love how the hospital could get Juice on the phone...but not Jax and Tara...aka, the parents of the kids in the hospital!  Every once in a while you have to suspend disbelief a bit.  But I am MORE than willing to do it with Sons of Anarchy because it's not an often occurrence.  These editors are anal as shit and it shows.

"Listen Tara...you just sit here and listen to some jazz.  We're going to cut off the nice dead man's hands." ROFLMAO - who said this?? Bobby??  I think it was at the cabin.  Absolutely hilarious.