Saturday, September 21, 2013

Fans of Anarchy

SPOILER ALERT:  I'm two episodes in on Season 6.

What the frig is going on with Jax and Tara???  How do they go through 5 seasons with mutual respect and then BAM!  It's Season 6; let's totally become different people!  Divorce?  I'm sorry, what?  Come again?  There is no WAY Jax set Tara up.  He would never do that.  And WHY would she believe Gemma after all this time?  Because she changed a few stinky diapers??  Are you SERIOUS??  That makes about as much sense as Bobby wandering around California looking for Nomad contenders.

Don't get me started on Jax being a big, fat CHEATER and hooking up WHILE Tara's in jail.  Again - I know he did Ima the orange-faced, yellow-haired skank...but that was, in a sick and twisted way, FOR Tara.  This hook-up-with-Stifler's-hot-hooker-mom thing was just totally beneath him.

Tara needs to sit Jax down...say "Dude.  What the EFF is going on?"  and show his ass what she found in the toy box.  You know, the paperwork GEMMA hid there.  And hell - if it's someone else?  Excellent.  Bring it on.  I love some good intrigue.  But it ain't Jax.  Wake the fuck up.

Moving on...

Meh.  Not thrilled so far.  Good thing we're only two 2 eps in.  Too much serious shit going down and not enough laughs to sustain it.  I'm sorry, Kurt, you being a Jersey guy AND a Rutgers guy AND a pretty damned cool biker dude, yourself...but I gotta say it.  I'm super hopeful things will change as the season goes on.  I don't mean to Monday Morning Quarterback...but there's a little too much heat in the kitchen.  WTF happened to Tig's hilarity?  WTF happened to funny probies?  WTF happened to Gemma whacking chicks in the face with skateboards (or whatever the hell she whacked that ho in the face with.  That shit was FUNNY.)  We are well on our way to another Season 3 Ireland feel and I'm not likin' it too much.  You have Juice drug and kill the junkie mother of the kid who just shot up his school, Newtown style?  Ew guys...ew.

That said...

I'm glad Dave Navarro is dead.  There.  I said it.  I don't like that guy being on the show.  He's fine on his tattoo show and all...but he's overkill on SOA.  Just a little too obvious.  And, frankly, the Latino stuff is getting on my nerves a little bit.  Remember when Kevin Alejandro got his ass killed by his own dad?  THEY were scary.  THEY were interesting.  THEY commanded you sit your ass up in your chair and pay a-friggin-tention.  This crew is like the kinder, gentler Latino gang who just wants to scare you a little while they ride by on their BMX bikes.

OK back to Tara.  WHY does she want to give Wendy those kids?  I get that Tara knows Wendy gets the whole "get out of the MC life" thing...but I can't say I trust her enough not to screw up. Wendy is just going to turn around and hand those babies back to Jax, because she loves him.  Or Gemma, because she'll make her life hell until she does.  That's what Gemma does.

Speaking of Gemma, does Katey Sagal kick some major ass?  She's just. So. Good.  How about when she came out of the bathroom and annoying, asshole, ponytail man was sitting there.  She had just been crying her eyes out but immediately straightened herself out an said "Fuck you" - even though he just mentioned his sister was the one Otto killed.  No apologies.  No surrender.  Gemma is the one constant on this show.  I wait every week to see what sick and twisted thing she's going to make look perfectly normal next...and she never disappoints.


Everyone just cross your fingers that some comic relief is coming our way.  Bring back Filthy Phil,
the laid-back-to-the-point-of-not-breathing prospect who will do just about anything.  Have Tig go into a strip club, only to find out the strippers are pre-op trannies...and have a great time.  Make Gemma go to the store with Tara and get into a fight with the produce wench.  Just do SOMETHING comical that will off-set the intensity of this season!  Please!